What is Spiritual Direction?

Spiritual direction is the art of sacred companionship. It is walking beside another as we listen for the quiet stirrings of the psyche, soul and the subtle movements of Spirit. Though the word director may suggest authority, my place is one of deep listening and noticing, attuned to the whispers of grace within your whole life. Sometimes, a director gently challenges and nudges, pointing you towards places where the sacred may be moving or has moved in your life. It is a shared process of attentiveness rather than teaching, a mutual listening that unfolds into a deeper understanding, a spacious knowing that emerges and deepens over time.

What type of training should a Spiritual Director have?

When choosing a spiritual director, it’s important to ensure they have completed formal training. Most reputable programs involve three years of formation in the Art of Spiritual Direction, emphasizing spiritual listening, psychological awareness, and ethical boundaries. Interns practice direction under supervision, receive feedback from mentors and peers, and refine their skills in a supportive setting.

Jesuit priest and author, James Martin, stresses that while faith and prayer are essential, structured training provides the discipline, accountability, and skills necessary for effective direction. A well-trained director listens carefully, asks discerning questions, and avoids imposing personal views, guiding others to recognize God’s presence in their lives. Spiritual direction should be approached with professionalism and humility, ensuring directors can help others encounter God authentically and ethically. Wise spiritual directors are those who listen carefully and are skilled in the ability to inquire and openly explore with the directee.

What does a spiritual direction session look like?

A spiritual direction session typically lasts about an hour. Before we begin, it’s helpful for you to choose a quiet, comfortable space where you won’t be interrupted or distracted.

Each session begins with a brief period of rest and reflection, inviting you to settle into Divine presence. You are then invited to share whatever feels most significant in your life at the moment. The foundation of spiritual direction is the belief that the Holy is present and active in all aspects of life, and you are encouraged to bring any questions, experiences, or thoughts into this sacred conversation.

We may pause at times to notice what your emotions, thoughts, or bodily sensations are communicating, or to listen for guidance in the quiet, inner places of your heart. Throughout the session, I will be listening attentively alongside you, offering observations and thoughtful questions to help you explore your spiritual journey more deeply. Occasionally, I may suggest spiritual practices, exercises, or reflections that you can carry into your daily life to nurture your relationship with Spirit.

What is the difference between Spiritual Direction, Therapy and Counseling?

Therapy focuses on mental and emotional healing, using clinical methods to address issues like anxiety, depression, or trauma. Spiritual direction, by contrast, centers on your relationship with the Divine — listening for how the Spirit is moving in your life and deepening your sense of purpose and connection. Spiritual direction can also be a great adjunctive help if you are in a therapeutic relationship already.

Pastoral counseling often supports people through specific crises such as grief, illness, or conflict, integrating faith and psychology for healing. Spiritual direction takes a longer view. It’s less about fixing problems and more about nurturing an ongoing, transforming relationship with God.

How often do people meet with a spiritual director?

Most people meet once a month. This allows time to reflect and notice sacred movement between sessions, while maintaining a steady rhythm of spiritual attention. However, sessions can be increased in certain circumstances such as a crisis or agreed upon direction for a contemplative endeavor, such as working through the Ignatian Exercises.

Do I need to belong to a particular faith tradition?

No. Spiritual direction honors each person’s unique spiritual path. While I am rooted in the Christian tradition, the focus is on your experience of the Divine, however you name or understand it. I honor your belief system and journey.

How do I choose a spiritual director?

Finding the right fit is important. We will begin with an initial conversation to sense comfort, trust, and shared understanding. Many people describe the right director as someone who feels like a safe, nonjudgmental companion on the journey. After three sessions, we will discuss once again if the fit feels comfortable. If it isn’t, I can help refer you to another director if you desire.

Is spiritual direction confidential?

Yes. What you share is held in confidence and sacred trust, except in cases where there is a legal or ethical obligation to report harm. We will review and sign a confidentiality agreement at the start of our work. The confidentiality and neutrality of spiritual direction can also provide a safe, non-judgmental place where you can wrestle with questions of faith and beliefs that you may not feel comfortable doing within a traditional denomination or church setting.

What if I’m awkward at praying?

Perfect. You’ll fit right in. Spiritual direction isn’t about praying right. It’s about noticing that you’re already in conversation, even when you think you’re on mute. In fact, we have so many preconceived notions of what prayer should be. You will find your own style—one that connects you to the Divine in love and friendship. And I promise: if there were a wrong way to pray, I’d likely be toast. Luckily, God seems to like burnt offerings.

Do I have to be holy to start spiritual direction?

You’ll find out your life is already holy. Holiness isn’t about perfection. You’ll just start realizing God’s been lingering in your everyday life this whole time. Holiness isn’t for the flawless; it’s for the curious. Laughter, too, is holy. And if you can’t laugh at yourself sometimes, don’t worry. Spirit has a gift for setting up teachable moments with excellent comedic timing.